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Friday night.

I went to introduce my friends from linden to my friend, and best bud Rachel last night, and what a good time it was. Went there downtown right by First National bank and partied hard, and couldn't remember a goddamned thing other than getting totally tanked, taking shots with this Amber chick, and her roomate Shelter (shelly). Scott's drunk ass called, and she and him ended up talking, and thought the guy needs to take a break from Decatur (land of dead-beats) and see the north shore. Anyway, hell with Scott! We were also playing a game called 'fuck the dealer.' I was actually lucky...didn't drink once in that game, cuz i got it right everytime, cuz the dealer was fucked himself, shan, and lol, man he hates me now. It was a good time. Left one of my friends there on accident but he forgave me. See what else...Oh Yeah, interesting. Amber and I 'took it outside' and she swung a fucking chair at me so I picked her up and spun her around a little bit. She liked it. That is why she hugged me and perhaps kissed me...??? Enough partying for me for awhile.

Saturday.

Lame and Plain. Went to work to do the redundant grilling shit from 10-7 tonight, thinking I had better things to do like playing my guitar all day and get homework done but nooooooo......had to make chicken patties for those fat-fuck football players and serve their asses cuz they are cool and all and had a game today.

During break, my co-workers wanted me to do impersonations of friends of mine and such. I did a classic one of Jesan's. Oh, I hope he doens't hear about it. Also can do a Ben impression, and a Dev impression (in an Indian accent: "I got bit by a dog.")...oh, priceless, never thought I had such talent. I had Ben fall off his chair laughing, and cried his eyes out.

After work I was supposed to meet Dev for a liquor run and go to a party with his posse but that never happened, and I guess he thought i was pissed that he asked me to get him booze. I wasn't pissed...just a little cautious but he's a good friend of mine. Feel bad, but I do what i have to do.

I went to Birch to visit a few people, holly, chad, sam, and steph. Later on, i ended up chillin' with Steph and Andy, walking around the dorm, looking for ciggarettes for them to smoke. come to find out later on that night, my friend 'Z' told me the girl that I "asked out" the other night gets all speechless when she hears my name, and went to the bar tonight. I got talked into going to the bar from Steph and Andy to meet up with her, but really had no ambition to do so....if i had a few drinks in me, maybe I would be more excited to. Thing is when I asked her out, I think i was looking to get some, but she's such a sweet, nice girl, and it would be so taboo to take advantage of that with her at the time. But hell, I developed some ideas from listening to them if i go out, i'll have that chance to get laid since April/March...whatever it was. Shit, it's been a long time. Well, at least I'm not in Jesse's shoes...been a year now for him? oh....i didn't say that, did i?

so i guess it would have been nice to know what bar she went to...first thing that came to mind was the U-Bar cuz she and her friends are all about hitting the club. I went there, shit, forogt my ID..and the bouncers didn't recognize me. I went all the way home, found my ID. Went back, got in...big hell no. Big hell no all over downtown.

Fuck it, went home and here I am. I'm half/half depressed about the whole thing. Oh well, my time will come. Cannot do these things out of force.

this girl i'm not totally physically attracted to in the first place, and I don't wnat her to get too attactched to me. I don't know what she thought I meant by this whole damn ordeal, and being in this predicament sucks too much ass, and is giving me a headache like a mother.

Wouldn't it be nice if life itself was easier than it is?