Go DJ...That My DJ....

Update on how the hell I am doing....

Aramark owns me, which means 1.) I'm called in all the time 2.) No one else knows how to do much around there, so they need me. 3.) I'm smart, sexy, and people like me!! (J/K)...

I made some friends there, and are cool to work with. The fulltimers are even cool as well. Know their stuff, and I know at times they can be picky how I do things (cook, dishes). Other than that, they are not bad at all. Out of all my jobs, I have the coolest bosses.

I will not have much free-time this semester. Be working three locations..pizza hut on campus, walnut, and lakeside food court. If you all want some class A subs, come to me tues and thurs around 10:30-12:30...then i'll have class, and then working til close at walnut. the weekends are going to suck ass too cuz i gotta be there as well...early mornings, late nights.

Since I am the only english speaking worker there, I have no choice really....

Peace Out

J2K

Riley....

I keep thinking I'm breaking the rules by mentoining names on this blog...

Riley was my very first official girlfriend. Very sweet and very gorgeous. I felt as if I didn't deserve her cuz she was too good! I have had her on my mind over the past couple of years (is that cheating on Laura..like I give a shit now anyway) a lot. We started to talk again two years ago quite a bit, even though she's in a serious relationship and still is today. Talking to her gave me so much relief that I can see where she is at in life, and to let her know how I am doing as well. Showed me that I wasn't a complete dick afterall. Every now and then we would give eachother a holler online, and end up talking for almost an hour every time. Talk weather, classes, where we are living, ask how our life is, family, how your bf is, how your gf is, that kind of thing.

I liked going to her house, pop in a movie, chat, hang out with her family..was all good. Her mom and my mom shared common ground for being hardcore mn viking fans...both get into it, but my mother ends up having the neighbors worry with her cussin' and screaming...heh...plus we went on walks, talked hours and hours on the phone, oh those were the days. She truly did make me very happy...


We lasted 8 months together. Was it genuine? Not really. I mean she is this gorgeous, sweet girl and I was in my world with my buddies in litchfield, and she had her thing at her town. Why did I let everything overshadow what we had? I was a selfish ass about everything. Why would I do her like that? Til this day, I keep wanting to go back and change my ways without going on with my life bein an insecure turd like I was and today. Think I am getting better.



I don't know why I am talking about her...first love, that kind of thing. But this girl was very gorgeous which makes me regret tearing this relationship apart. If i would have still called her after I broke up with her, I think she would like me better plus there would have been a chance for us to be together but..she found someone else right away afterwards.

I do miss her a lot. She was there thru those shitty times with Laura. she happened to meet laura once. kind of awkward, but I think she told me she liked Laura...problay didn't mean it though. I remember doing a drunk email to her one night about everything, and she emailed me back, and that was comforting.

Riley, if you see this I still have you in my thoughts and I thank you. I want to apologize for being a complete ass. I went thru a nightmare, believe me, and I don't wish what I have gone thru upon anybody. I didn't mean to take everything for granted like I did and I hope we can be very, very good friends. I hope you are happy with whatever you are doing.

Peace

J2K

Dead Horse

Guns N F'N Roses



SICK OF THIS LIFE
NOT THAT YOU'D CARE
I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WITH
WHOM THESE FEELINGS I SHARE

NOBODY UNDERSTANDS, QUITE WHY WE'RE HERE
WE'RE SEARCHIN' FOR ANSWERS
THAT NEVER APPEAR

BUT MAYBE IF I LOOKED REAL HARD I'D
I'D SEE YOU'RE TRYIN' TOO
TO UNDERSTAND THIS LIFE,
THAT WE'RE ALL GOING THROUGH
(THEN WHEN SHE SAID SHE WAS GONNA LIKE
WRECK MY CAR...I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO)

SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I'M BEATIN' A DEAD HORSE
AN I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'D BE BRINGIN' ME DOWN
I'D LIKE THAT OUR LOVE'S
WORTH A TAD MORE
IT MAY SOUND FUNNY BUT YOU'D THINK BY NOW
I'D BE SMILIN'
I GUESS SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE
NEVER CHANGE

I MET AN OLD COWBOY
I SAW THE LOOK IN HIS EYES
SOMETHIN' TELLS ME HE'S BEEN HERE BEFORE
'CAUSE EXPERIENCE MAKES YOU WISE
I WAS ONLY A SMALL CHILD
WHEN THE THOUGHT FIRST CAME TO ME
THAT I'M A SON OF A GUN AND THE GUN OF A SON
THAT BROUGHT BACK THE DEVIL IN ME

BUT SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE
I'M BEATIN' A DEAD HORSE
AN I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'D BE BRINGIN' ME DOWN
I'D LIKE THAT OUR LOVE'S
WORTH A TAD MORE
IT MAY SOUND FUNNY BUT YOU'D THINK BY NOW
I'D BE SMILIN'
I GUESS SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE
NEVER CHANGE

I AIN'T QUITE WHAT YOU'D CALL AN OLD SOUL
STILL WET BEHIND THE EARS
I BEEN AROUND THIS TRACK A COUPLE O' TIMES
BUT NOW THE DUST IS STARTIN' TO CLEAR
OH YEAH!!!

SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I'M BEATIN' A DEAD HORSE
AN I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'D BE BRINGIN' ME DOWN
I'D LIKE THAT OUR LOVE'S
WORTH A TAD MORE
IT MAY SOUND FUNNY BUT YOU'D THINK BY NOW
I'D BE SMILIN'
OOH YEAH, I'D BE SMILIN'
NO WAY I'D BE SMILIN'
OOH SMILIN'

SICK OF THIS LIFE
NOT THAT YOU'D CARE
I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE
WITH WHOM THESE FEELINGS I SHARE

Music

Enjoy it while I can...got me a nice corner in my room to store my three guitars. have tiny amps, it'll all be good to have like a little studio going on. I'll do what I can, and I have some material written. I am more of an acoustic guitarist guy, so it'll be folky. Today, I saw a Bob Dylan collection package and was very close to get it at Wal-Mart for thirty bucks. I think it'll be well worth it. I have three of his so far. "Blood on the tracks" "Blonde on Blonde" and "Time out of Mind."

Good songwriter indeed. don't mind his singing either, even though lots knock him.

Saying things and doing things are different. I feel like a phony these days when I tell ppl that i'm a musician, but really haven't done shit since '03. I came to Bemidji and things change. I heard some good sublime tunes tonight in a friends car, and hearing the groove just made me feel that same feeling that I have with a girl that I like who is breathtaking...just like that CD. forget the album, but it's killer. It's like the sex I haven't had in months.

I was off and runnin today, but looking at the part of my room with guitars and shit makes me stoked. room 273 B wing Linden will rock out all year....

Peace out

J2K

B-Town = Gutter Sluts, Best Friends, and Earning A Degree

I was just thinking on the way home from work today I have it made. I mean, I am happy that I get along with my co-workers, I am friends with a lot of RA's here, I seem to strike a conversation everywhere I go on campus with people that I know well or people that I have just met. Thank God I am here despite the bad breakup....

A Co-worker yesterday made my day. I forget her name, (Malaysian girl...lot of them) but she told me that I have a smile on my face all the time. How ironic. I went thru a shitty week. I have to move, I heard some devastating news that Laura is living with white-trash, still dealing with moochers and always feel bad letting them down, arrrghhhh!!

For one thing, I don't think I am 'a friend' to people like Tyrone cuz all he wants out of me is to do him favors just so his lazy ass can't do anything. Tears me up inside. It's like nice guys finish last but it is just weird for me to say no now cuz all my life I have not. I'm starting to realize that I need to look out for myself. I just question all of my life, have I really gotten to know myself? These days, it's like "Jon, I want you to meet Jon." And I am just starting to get to know me. What are my pet peeves, what are my interests....that sort of thing.


I was just a'wandering last night. I was up at Co-worker Dave's room (Dev is how it is really spelled but pronounced as "Dave"..he's the PAA i was talking about) with Ben Dosso (from Africa), another co-worker, and shot the shit for a couple hours about work, listening to tunes, giving Ben crap about having too many lady friends. Tweeked out..woah.

"So Ben, how are your girlfriends?"

"What the hell you talking about? Don't say shit if you don't know for sure. Don't want the wrong people hearing stuff and get me into trouble. Never ever say that again, you hear me?!!"

"Dont' be an ass, Ben!!"

"Say that again...no, no, say what yo usaid to me!!"

"Don't be an ass, Ben!!"

"Ohhhh...."

(He'll do the snakebite on your arm)

"Don't you ever dare say that to me again!!"

(Shove)

He, for real, would try to strangle you if you push his buttons...no worries, he is harmless. You have to know him too to picture how he tweeks. It's priceless....talks fast, and is very loud. I mean he brings it upon himself why we push his buttosn cuz it's entertaining.

It was a good time. Ben's the type of guy you need to be careful with what you say. Otherwise he's alright. Dev is a blunt motherfucker, who told the head-ppl of the RA's at meetings that "Canoeing and camping are for rednecks...isn't there something else we can do?" Someone needs to woop this guy into shape. Let him know he's at the North Shore called BEMIDJI and that is the way we do things around here. He was also knocking fishing and hunting...which was a big NO NO!!

I had fun chillin' with those guys. Oh, and Jesan (RA at Pine) is your average smartass-blunt type too. Gave me a hardtime wearing a hair net today...i don't take anything to heart. He's a good buddy of mine. When I first met him, he was like "What's up, dipshit?"...wha...."Dont' be offended...I don't even know you!!"

I give thanks to Andy, Jon, Abeeku (Samuel), Cooper Alex, Ryan, Jesse and list goes on for being themselves and helping me out thru hardtimes. Dont' know what I can do without them.

The females...not gutter sluts....are very sweet and genorous as well. I met Erika last night, who's an RA at oak...on my old floor. She's from montana and we both are political science majors (I still yet need to switch to that major). Discussed about what we want to do after college. I think I want to be a politcial analysis on Fox News...and she was like "oh, so you like fox news...." that's alright, she wasn't too impressed with what I said, but we are people...at least we can know eachother as people instead of knowing where we stand with politics. (AT least Jesan can't give me shit about being conservative...) Anyway, she is pretty cool, she's not sure what to do after college. However she has an idea on what to put on her thesis....way ahead of me!!

Steph came to Wally's tonight, and it has been awhile since I have talked to her. Not that I didn't want to talk to her over the past couple weeks...it's just that I am such a fool to make drunken phone calls to her while I was out of state a few nights in a row, and didn't know if I annoyed her or ticked her off. I didn't wnat her to think I'm a ridiculous drunk bastard or whatever that may have said some foolish crap. Anyway, I'm a sucker for doing that kind of crap under the influence....making phone calls, and worrying about what I said the next day!! (Good to know I haven't had a beer in a week. Need to lay off that stuff cuz it hurts the bank account.) Anyway, As far as I know, it is all good talking to her. We said hi and asked eachother how we are doing...that kind of thing and it was no problem at all. She's an RA too...Kudos to her!!

Saw Kelsey at the front desk tonight, working with my friend Chigo. I helped Chigo move her stuff to my friend Gille's house earlier this week. She's from Nigeria, such a nice person. Probaly consider her as one of my good friends here. Kelsey is my friend Andy's ex, so she was knocking him quite a bit but I blew it off. I like Andy. I like Kelsey. Not choosing sides. Anyway, I Would like to hang out with her again, and catch up. Never did have a problem with her, and hindsight, she never deserved the bullshit she went thru after her breakup with Andy. Undertand my friend Andy is not the most compassionate person you'll ever meet when it comes to girlfriends, but how she was treated by certain people (My slut-bag ho ex and my other friend Jon) after the breakup, was uncalled for. She is also glad I dumped Laura's ass, and Chigo herself told me she sees Laura around, and comes out as fake and cheap. Doesn't that feel damn good...but still, I'm still hurting about everything....Why? What do I want from her? I don't know!!

I am blessed to find friends up here, but I regret knowing the gutter slut herself, Laura. Jesus Christ am I still talking about her? Goes to show she's a type that is out to ruin your life and the type you'll love to hate. I am going to write her a letter and put it on her car to end it all. Say everything that is needed to be said and have her live with it. thanks to her, I became more aggressive cuz she fed the monster...

Peace Out

J2K

The Pearls Of Rock N' Roll Decadence....

Guns N Roses...Hell of a group. I Can Recall my first time hearing these guys. I had to be 3 or 4 years old, year was 1987 and the tube played the video "Paradise City" and it was a bit vague, do remember the shout "Take Me Home..." Thought they were the most extreme rock band ever since, and still stand tall in that aspect. I have not seen a band since then to fill their shoes. Good tunes to tell people to 'FUCK OFF!!!'

Axl is an asshole. Was on a huge power trip (wanted to be Madonna instead of Rock N' Roll), He broke the band up, he smashed a bottle of liquor over some woman's head, horrible boyfriend. I laugh at the video "patience" everything when he smashes the telephone, cuz I went thru that crap in high school and today. This girl in high school would call me every night and just made me want to smash the phone every time

Slash's phenomonal guitar playing to Duff's balls out bass riffs, they measure up to be the best rock band near the 21st century, and still hold the throne today. Velvet Revolver I must add I am impressed with their stuff.

You Ain't The First

G'NR

I tried so hard just to get through to you
But your head's so far
from the realness of truth
Was it just a come on in the dark
Wasn't meant to last long
I think you've worn your welcome honey
I'll just see you along as I sing you this song

Time can pass slowly,
things always change
You day's been numbered
And I've read your last page
You was just a temporary lover
Honey you ain't the first
Lots of others came before you woman
Said but you been the worst
Sa' you been the worst

So goodbye to you girl
So long, farewell
I can't hear you cryin'
Your jivin's been hell
So look for me walkin'
Down your street at night
I'll be in with another
Deep down inside
DEEP DOWN INSIDE

High Fidelity

This is a great movie for those who are going "why me" regarding relationships. This film is about Rob (John Cusack) searching for answers what is the reason behind his breakups: was it meant to be? why did it happen? Was it me? Was it her? One Word to describe it: Fate...throughout this movie is based on fate. and by watching this, I am like "Wow...this is exactly what I am going thru with my life"

This girl in the movie, her name happens to be LAURA and reminds me a lot of my 'old Laura'. She and him break up, and next thing he knows, she is dating someone else RIGHT AWAY LIKE MY LAURA IS....and she moves in with this guy LIKE MY LAURA DID. Rob struggles thru this movie, heartbroken, and so forth. However, this movie opened my eyes, and made me feel a whole lot better with my situation. Not only that, but with REJECTION. Man's simple weakness.

Rob: "Should I bolt every time I get that feeling in my gut when I meet someone new? Well, I've been listening to my gut since I was 14 years old, and frankly speaking, I've come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains."

So true about me

Rob: "I can see now I never really committed to Laura. I always had one foot out the door, and that prevented me from doing a lot of things, like thinking about my future and... I guess it made more sense to commit to nothing, keep my options open. And that's suicide. By tiny, tiny increments."

Part of this is true...I am not any better than that janitor guy she is with. I'm still nothing, don't hold a real job, still kind of a slacker. No woman wants that at all.

And...

"She's right! I broke up with HER!"

He broke up with this one girl in the movie, and shortly after, she had sex with another dude, and it hurt him. Exactly what happened with Laura and I. Why should I feel this way since I dumped her? is it competition 'tween she and I..who will find that someone first...I do not know. Ahhhhh!!!

I reccomend this movie to everyone who questions relationships. It saved my heart.

J2K

Home Sweet Home...

Tomorrow at this time I'll rest my head at home (Linden Hall that is). I cannot wait to get out of this dump at Oak Hall. 1) Laura will not be calling 2) It's peace and quiet 3) most of my friends will be there, especially at Open Borders (Linden 1B).

So I got this nickname around campus now..."Holly-Jon", cuz amongst my friends there are a lot of Jon/Johns! So, they refer to me as "holly-jon" cuz we are seen together a lot, I guess. I don't think my friend Holly knows. It's cool and all, but I just hope people don't get the idea that she and I are dating. Just so you all know, Holly and I are good friends and if it happens, it'll happen. She's a nice person, and she's attractive but I am not sure if we are compatible. She looks at me for moral support and vice versa. As far as I stand with girls now, I'm trying to get on my own steering wheel to get to know myself.

Heh, I don't know what else to write about. Still feel sucker-punched from yesterday. Here we go again! Anyway Just so you all know, I will be moving out of my dorm, and be back to 273 B. Stop by, you locals, to kick it sometime.

I wish my friends who are holding RA/PAA positions the best of luck. Jesan, Joanna, Fatima, Yussup, Steph, Dave...kudos to you all. I suppose I'll wish my brother luck too at UND!! I'll try to stay out of trouble...but they all have to catch me in the act first. Not illegal til you get caught, like how they say. Have to watch out for Yussup, who is a legend I know from the Russian area who is at Maple Hall. Strict bastard. I'm sure Dave and I will be raising hell over there at Maple. Dave is going to be a PAA and is from India. Not only one of my favorite co-workers but a good friend of mine.

Look forward to another semester. A change in the scene and new beginning....

Tootles

J2K

You Cannot Kill What Is Stronger Than Death

It's official...(Here's another entertaining Laura rant, by the way)

I know for a fact "The Whore" is sleeping with "Mop-head" after calling her today to tell her I needed to get my bike back. called her up, and she told me flat out to never call her again cuz she and her 'friend' found a new place! My first reaction was "Have fun playing with those old balls, miss quick-fix..I need to get my fucking bike back, done chit chatting with you, that is all I want!!" Threw me off guard, but I knew this day would come. Question is did my world once again turn upside down...yes it did. Another salt to the wound. Better off unsaid, but I made it quite clear on the way to pick up my bike in her Rav4 I Never want to see her or talk to her again. Period. K, I made a mistake calling her a couple weeks ago to get into good terms, perhaps catch up and see where it goes from there. NOPE. She fucking does me wrong again. In conclusion, she lives an insufficient life. I told her that and blah blah blah...nothing was said back to me right away, because she knew I treated her right. She knew I set her straight. She knew she didn't deserve me. Thing that has always bothered her was whenever we go to places, she'd just be in my shadow. She'd hated it that I see friends all over, and she gets ignored (cuz she's a bitch, didn't i mention that?) I didn't see it then, but I see it now. Damn straight she should be in my shadow cuz I know how to be someone's friend. I know how to keep everyting cool without making things worse like she does. All her friends now were met thru me, well she did say they can all go to hell today. I laughed.

She could not handle making it without me. I know this for a fact, and that is why I feel so damn good about all of this. All I want to do after being driven like I have been is to make her life hell whenever we communicate. She is letting shit burn now, trying to erase me by doing what she does. She probaly lieks it that I'm furious with she and her Old Man, but I know my life will turn out better in a long run, and soon I will forget that I once loved her...I hope. During that, he'll be scrubbing toilets on BSU ground as she works at her ma and pa's gas station. Am I arrogant? No...but compared to them, I damn well should be!

There's something I want to say about "Old Balls." See, we'll run into eachother here on BSU ground, and to him, I am Bill Gates, and he's just a hobo polishing the toilets that I piss in, trying to make money, serving people like me and the rest of the students who have ambition and goals. Oh, but the poor son of a bitch chosed the wrong path to pick pecker hairs for a living, ignores his children and buys booze every weekend as I become a political analysis on Fox News. You do the math...this guy sure sounds like a real winner to me. Just makes me want to puke cuz I don't know what this says about me if Laura settles for a guy like this!!

Well anyway, on the way to pick up my bike instead of saying mean stuff to her, I pry did the right thing going off on what my life was like now...visiting friends at illonois twice this summer, got 3 jobs, she doesn't like it that I have a lot of friends sicne we broke up, scored high with my GPA, being single and such and she spat back into my face, saying I am an asshole that rubs it into her face that I am much better than her with what I do. Well sorry, Laura, if you suck at life and I'm trying to do something with mine. Then she went off on how I wasn't the one who called her everyday to tell her how beautiful she is and say that I am thankful that I am with her...her current guys does! Whoopidy fucking doo...I cannot even count how many times I done for her, it's true, and she just sweeps everything about me under the rug to forget just how true I was to her. It is hard to be thankful to be with her, and things change as the relationship goes further...you don't do that lubby dubby stuff anymore and it wears off.

I just wasted time with this cheap, peice of trash. I dumped her March, and not over the bitch. Wish I can sing "You Ain't the First" by GN'R with pride. It'll take time. But I'm living, that's enough for me.

BLS- You cannot kill what is stronger than death

Good ol' Zakk is right on that one.

Bed Of Nails

Alice Cooper

(So True...so very true about my lovelife)

love the way you hurt me.
My tears your wine.
Your thoughts would draw my plan for a cruise in vain.
Like talons in the pale moon shine above us.
My gained pleasure in pain is slowly vanished when
you sink deeper and deeper into a void you are venomous love.

Yeah, we're gonna fight
We do it every night
Baby, when you scratch
You know I'm gonna bite
You can make me die
I can make you cry
Opposites attract
That's the reason why

No one else could make you feel
Like I do, I do, I do
No one ever gets as deep inside you
As I do, baby

Our love is a bed of nails
Love hurts good on a bed of nails
I'll lay you down and when all else fails
I'll drive you like a hammer on a bed of nails

First we're gonna kiss
then we're gonna say
Dirty little words
Only lovers say
Rockin' through the night
Rollin' on the floor
When they hear us screamin'
They'll be breakin' down the door

No one else could make you feel
Like I do, I do, I do
No one ever gets as deep inside you
As I do, baby

Our love is a bed of nails
Love hurts good on a bed on nails
I'll lay you down and when all else fails
I'll drive you like a hammer on a bed of nails

Bed of nails, bed of nails
I'll drive you like a hammer on a bed of nails
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow
Gonna drive you like a hammer
Baby, put me in your slammer, oh yeah

No one else could make you feel
Like I do, I do, I do
No one ever gets as deep inside you
As I do, baby

Our love is a bed of nails
Love hurts good on a bed of nails
I'll lay you down and when all else fails
I'll drive you like a hammer on a bed of nails

Bed of nails, get on my bed of nails
I'll drive you like a hammer on a bed of nails
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow
Gonna drive you like a hammer
Baby, put me in your slammer, oh yeah
I'll drive you like a hammer on a bed of nails

J2K

Coming home wasn't as hecktic as last time from illinios (Alright, that term just reminds me of that Cinderella ballad). Stopped at Eau Claire which was half way, and kicked it with Charlie again, had a few beers. Got in a fight almost with a black guy downtown by the bar area. Called him brother, and he didn't like that. and I also threw up in front of the bar.

Good thing about coming home I get to look forward in playing my new Les Paul guitar...yes, sunburst color!!


Over a week, I pounded in beers like a maniac along with doing 'the wacky'. Other words...P.O.T!! I am not very impressed with myself at all, and my intentions were shallow to fullfill my needs to forget about stressors in my life.

I thought I was going to get fired from my job cuz i did't tell them anything, thought i'd fail my european geography class. Come to find out I got a "B" and I got my job back. Things are good I guess, kind of hate working at Wal-nut though.

18 credits this fall, two jobs...maybe that'll keep me away from the demon I call Alcohol!!

For future reference, I'll keep the John Cusack attitude with alcohol to a minimum. Ask me about what I mean right there.

Peace Out

J2K

B-Town Saturday

I will be @ B-Town Saturday. Been a week since I have been away, and seems like three days. Holy Shit, my mom, friends are going to be so mad at me when I return. I didn't tell a soul unless you got a drunken phone call.

Eau Claire is where I'll rest my head tonight. Pry go there to crash, and take it easy. Too much driving even from Eau Claire to B-Town (good 5 hours). Good to stay here cuz it would be Too much driving for me if I am to head out from Mahomet, Illonois today and drive for 12 hours. I had a good time, but now is the right time to go.



Peace Out

J2K

Another Day In Champaign...No Telling When I'll Return to B-Town!!

It is Thursday, and I have been here since Saturday...almost a week, goddmamn. I think people in Bemidji are starting to worry about me, including my co-workers. I'm a wanderer.

I'm still alive after killing 30 packs of beer 5 nights in a row. Busch light and Icehouse two nights in a row with Ross, Charlie, and I...rest of the night after Scott came home, we downed a couple more! Had Old Style last night by the lake. This lake is actually a tourist attraction called "Lake of the Woods" in Mahomet, Illonois. Way to Rip Minnesota off!! Anyway, Good times, would have drank more but Taco Bell (sucks ass) ruined that for me. Ross, Scott, Charlie, and I spent the evening at the Hooka bar again, and watched an amazing jazz-funk instrumental band. Scott made the claim to fame to play harmonica (harp). Sounded good. I FORGOT to bring my bass, won't be recording but when I come back, I want to get into more of that stuff, play crap in one key throughout the whole recording, and sound damn good. Later that night, got some taco bell, started drinking. Scott and I had a cigar, while his sis (Laura) and charlie shot the shit. (I think they like eachother...well, Laura confessed she likes Charlie)

Scott came back Tuesday evening, and had ourselves a good time. Got some beer (Busch Light) and drank the whole thing at a picnic table by the lake with Charlie. I haven't seen the SOB since May, so it was good getting drunk with him. Passed out later in the living, room, and caught his sorry ass...yes, caught him as he was attempting to piss all over the coffee table!! Jesus Christ I finally met Ozzy Osbourne's twin. This dude is known for blacking out, pissing all over his CD's, pissing all over his roomate, interesting character.

I don't know if I dig his hippie mentality too much, but he's still cool. Music college changed his way of thinking, and i don't really dig. Hippies suck in my opinion. They bitch about society and don't do a damn thing as they get high, and lose motivation to contribute to the world. I felt out of place going against Liberals (charlie and scott) tuesday night about music. Had some arugments what is good listening, and told them why I don't dig that polka + depressing songwriter shit. Whatever floats his boat, I guess.

He is now into this "sad bastard" music (Elliot Smith) and weather channel/elevator music while I am still stuck in my past, listening to rock n' roll. People change, oh well, maybe I cannot accept that yet i guess. It's just that I cannot drive with him cross country listening to Miles Davis or soft listening crap. Hard to do. Jesus, what's sad is I cannot have him listen to any G'NR anymore these days...sell out. And I don't really care for his old roomates much either!

J2K never sells himself out with his music. yeah, i have been getting into a lot of rap lately. Wu Tang is the shit, 2Pac, Trick Daddy..I can go on forever!! but I'm not like "rap rules..rock sucks" like this guy! Once I dig my rock music, it stays that way. I will not deny my music taste!


Elliot Smith Sucks!!

I'll see you all whenever...depends on if I'll have anymore fun!!

;)

J2K

"The Dream Police this song is STUCK IN MY HEAD"

Good weekend, muy bien weekend. Got nothing to do, got a place to chill and rest my head. It's tits, man, it's tits. This afternoon, we are just chillin' having some beers and don't know what else is going to go down. I had another drunk adventure last night and woke up this morning, still freakin' about being @ illini'. Scott should be back tomoorrow and I cannot wait. Go to the bridge, get ripped, and have a few drinks like ol' times.

Man, I woke up this morning, and regretted the fact that I send drunk messages to ppla nd so forth. I'm having a good time, and I don't want to ruin all of that.

Keep it together

Peace
J2K

"What the fuck, Bergie, could have gotten us Kill!"

It was Friday, and was told to go visit my friends down at Champaign, Illonois. Ross, Scott's bro, told me that his parents were gone from town for the whole weekend, and wanted Charlie and I to stop down to have a good time.

Friday I left to go visit Charlie at his new home in Eau Claire. The night was a blast. I got there around 11 pm, and headed over to a kegger at this house party. I had a good time, despite the fact it was like 50 guys and 4 girls. Lame. I went there with Charlie, another high school friend Evan, and this other guy. I had like 7 cups of beer, watched black guys against white boys in freestyling-rap, it was fun. I like how the black dude got into a white guy's face and was like "you done, accept it"...woah.. intense! They all dig my pink floyd shirt and made reference out of it in their freestylin'. Told me the shit is easy....think of your life and it'll come easy.

Two hours later or so Charlie and I went to a bar. Told me it was a laid back place...nope it wasn't. It was loud, no place to sit, flooded with city boys getting drunk. Looked like an old jazz club but taken over by your average wisconsin drunks. We had a grain belt there, and took off to a sub shop cuz Charlie wanted me to meet this girl Abbey that he lieks. She's cute, likes to talk star wars and music. She made us some damn good subs @ 3 Am. Things do not close down at night in this college town. Anyway, we Got us some food, and a girl all by herself was drunk and sat next to us...woah. I think her friends ditched her cuz someone asked me if I'm her date and I said "Now I am..." And they left. Yea, me being a mack daddy! Oh...She was out, and was just dozing off in front of us. She was mumbling stuff and I was like "well hey, i have a booth here...sit here so you can be comfortable."...she sat next to me and I tried to strike a conversation..(I was tipsy too). Charlie didn't like that i was being sweet on her like that...shit, I hate knowing I did stupid shit drunk the next day!! Charlie and I finally got up, told the employees about her and they'll take care of it. We walked a billion blocks home, crashed, woke up and drove to Champagne.

We got to Champagne around 4 pm yesterday. Come to find out Scott is gone with his parents at Michigan for a few days so I'm just chillin' with his little bro, Ross, which is cool. Kind of awkward that I'm at my best friend's house without him here, but it's cool. Ross and I are close as well, and of course Charlie is here. Scott should be back on Tuesday, So I'll be in Illini' for awhile. So anyway, it was a party the second we got here. Ross called his buddies up, got a little ripped here, went over to a buddy's house (Alex's) and got ripped there. Ross showed me the handicapped sign he took out from the concrete with a punch, and that sign is bent back, touching the ground practically. He took the som'a bitch out of the concrete!

We all Took off to the hooka bar and had some flavored tobacco shit from a hooka. It is an India thing. We were there with some of his buddies. Had a lot of blue moons there. I made some beligerant calls to people (Oh poor twisted me)...got ahold at least two of them, left drunk messages on others (I deeply apologize). I got ahold of Jesse, who I haven't talked to for a long time, told me he got another job so that's cool. He's been avoiding trouble which I cannot blame him. I also got ahold of Andy, and told me he was worried about where I went cuz I didn't tell anyone. He's glad that I made it there safe and having a good time. Get hammered for him that's for sure! Didn't want to call Scott cuz I didn't want to make him feel bad that I'm partying, and he's up at Michigan with his parents, chillin'. I apologize to those if i was being too drunk. Anywho, later on that night I met a jamaican guy at the bar who was chillin', having a few cheap vodka shots. Told me to stick with my music. Met some black ladies too who bought me a boiler maker drink. Kicked my ass....

After the bar, we took off to the same freind's house, Alex, and went from there. We ended up at another bar that was like the U-Bar, played the same music, danced a lil' bit...had a good time.

On the way home, we were at an intersection with these wannabee thug looking people staring at us, talking shit. I was like 'fuck this..." I yelled out of the car "Hey we got your momma in here!" ...Ross tweeked, and the other friend, Brian, talked shit to them as well from the car, and flciked them off. We avoided those people like a plague! "What the fuck, Bergie, could have gotten us killed!!"

Partied til sunrise. Passed out at the same spot on the floor like last time I was here at Alex's house. Dint' throw up off the balcony this time. I didn't have a pillow so my head hurts like a motherfucker.

Rest of the week will be off the hook!! I won't be seeing B-town for awhile now...

Peace

J2K

What is too Good To be True?

I was told by someone once to name something that is too good to be true. My answer was:

Zakk Wylde.

Why? He was 19 years old and played the most heaviest shit in the world with Ozzy. "No Rest For the Wicked" is my favorite Ozzy record. "Miracle Man" has the guitar talking in that song like "Iron Man"...us rockers know about that myth. Anyway Holy God, this guy rocks. He made the claim to fame right there and no one else can top that I think. Shit, when I was 19 I was a loner making my way up to Bemidji, and basically leaving the nest where I was raised. Fucking Zakk Wylde was playing at the Wembley Stadium for Christ's sakes at that age.

I feel no one gives this guy enough credit. BLS (Black Label Society) is a killer band, and rocks solid compared to this 'nu metal' shit. My dream would be having a Pilsen beer with him, and jamming.

For those about to rock, Salute to Zakk Wylde Before AC/DC!

The Only Good Thing About Life Is....

It's a Damn Good Cereal

-Mattie "Probemaster" Young

Amen

Wally's

Desperation for a BSU student getting a job = Wally's.

Where did my 600 bucks go? When people say alcohol can catch up to ya, I guess it is true...even financially. grrrr...so I started a couple days ago playing with chemicals and tools getting this cafeteria and their Pizza Hut looking pretty sharp. Now there isn't a whole lot to do 'cept for going over what you did, and doing it all over just so they can find a reason to be there this week. It's a lot of grueling work, I'll tell ya. However, having this job takes me back when I used to mow cemetery...I'm all by myself, I free my mind and think about stuff. How I can better things with my life (after today for doing a half-assed project and handing it in without my name on it. At least I did it and didn't get totally fucked!!) Not only I think of how to improve myself, but I Think of all the women I used to know or know things like that. About how to plan another trip to Illini' to record again with my best frined who happens to have a studio room in his apartment. It's quiet, I get my peace. What a man needs to do to get away from the troubles at home...cept I live by myself! If there's enough trouble here living with nobody, then I am not ready to move in with other people. it goes to show!

I rushed my euro project over the last couple of days, and I forgot to do some portions. Oh well, I did enough I think for having all this work to do in 2 weeks, while I had other priorities (Yea right...I'm lazy and I am always out and running around somewhere). I think I'll get a D on it but it's passing, right. I don't care...that is why I question why I am here.

I had a good conversation today with Jon, the janitor at Wal-Nut. He's a good christian guy, but doesn't seem to be happy here. He always complains about his job, and gave me some dirt about the management. He told me that when he was young he wanted to be a bum and travel the world (hey, that is just exactly what I posted on one of my blogs earlier...wow!) But he fell in love, and is happily married. Glad to hear that. Told me about a man who just left everything behind and moved to Alaska during his last days. He built a house, lived by himself on an island, and just spent the rest of his thirty years that way. It inspires me a little bit, but I like to be around people.

When Jon told me about the management at Aramark, he gave me a fair warning of each and everyone of them. This Asian chick, Leena, I hear can be a total bitch and get on your case all the time when she should be focusing on catering instead of the cafeteria. Just because she graduated here two decades ago, having this job should get her good stature! she is not happy. She needs a boyfriend I think. Won't be me I'll tell you that much. Heines, the head cook, (looks like Milton from Office-Space) Harasses women a lot, and I don't dig that. (That is just what I hear, keep that in mind) but if I see that go on, he'll hear it from me. Tony is very laid back, wants to please the management and employees, and pity him for being in that position. I think he expects a lot from me so I'm doing my best. I guess he and Lakeside are playing a game of tug of war with me cuz people are leaving, and both places need help so in the next couple of days I'll be back and forth with Lakeside and Wally's. Good times!

well this job is money I guess..every job has an asshole (or a bitch). That's life.

and cut

J2K

The Garden

Had my fair share of the Garden....

Guns N Roses

You know you're all alone
Your friends they aren't at home
Everybody's gone to the garden
As you look into the trees
You can look but you don't see
The flowers seem to tease you at the garden
Everybody's there, but you don't seem to care
What's it with you man, and this garden


Turned into my worst phobia,
A crazy man's utopia
If you're lost no one can show ya,
But it sure was glad to know ya
Only poor boys take a chance,
On the garden's song and dance,
Feel her flowers as they wrap around,
But only smart boys do without


You can find it all inside
No need to wrestle with your pride
No you ain't losin' your mind
You're just in the garden
They can lead you to yourself
Or you can throw it on the shelf
But you know you can look inside
For the garden


I wasn't really scared
Lost my virginity there,
To a gypsy with blond hair
But now no one seems to care
Like a mouse inside a maze
Wandering round 4 daze
With a smile upon my face,
I never wanna leave this place
Only poor boys take a chance,
On the garden's song and dance,
Feel her flowers as they wrap around,
But only smart boys do without
Turned into my worst phobia,
A crazy man's utopia
If you're lost no one can show ya,
But it sure was glad to know ya
Bye bye
So long, bye bye
It's glad to know ya
Bye bye
Bye bye
Aw...so long

Laziness...

I am convinced someone needs to check me into a "Laziness Rehab" cuz I got fucking like 14 pages to type for my european project left, and I haven't done jack since two weeks ago. Project is due Wednesday at 4 pm, and conviniently, my buddy Tony from Aramark just hired me to tidy up Walnut Hall for this fall!! Dammit, anyway. I'm broke, I need a job, but I don't want a job cuz I have this project to do...You just cannot win!

Came home looking like a horse's ass today,with a big sweat ring on my shirt, working in that stuffy building. It was nice to go out and do something productive, however. Good to work with those people, very laid back, and it's easy work. Wipe everything down, take apart those coffee machines and clean them, etc. Everyone at Wally's will see my good work hopefully :)! Anyway, I am just overwhelmed cuz I have this project to do by Wednesday and I would be doing it but my Eurospring buddy took my materials with him to Bonanza tonight....arrgghhh...so, bored once again, I'm typing yet another-waste-of-my-time blog! (I hope you all like it). I will NOT, I repeat..I WILL NOT be able to leave this room of mine, besides for work. My phone will not be answered (never answer the thing anyway...get on that with another blog, and suprisingly has nothing to do with Laura. It's those goddamned moochers who need a ride to KFC!! Sorry, I cannot afford to support their ass with the gas expenses now...get your own fucking vehicle and learn how to cook for Christ's sakes!!!),

Tongiht, tomorrow, I'll just be a ghost..no one can see me!! Jon will be a zombie with this project!

I am a huge ass procrastinator, and yes, I'm a half-ass student here. That's a lot better than being a piss-poor student and don't do shit like the good ol' days up at Tamarack 8th floor...the dark ages that made me fall down the slippery slope during my first year here at college. Plus drinking at Laura's cabin everynight didn't help either....but anywho, feels like I am back to my ol' self, slacking off. Oh those days were fun...movie nights, boozing it, doing finals while drunk...ahhhh..can only get away with that shit during your freshman year!!

Now, it's time to hit the ol' dusty trail...From Copenhagen to Prauge I go!!

Best Wishes to everyone else who has been, or will be in this position (Sorry Curt, going thru training with those miserable hours cannot compare to what I am going thru right now!!)

Peace

and cut....J2K